3D Wolf Crotch Underwear makes your man “sexy and wild,” but does it honor the founding principles and ideals of the Union? No, it does not. Fortunately, there is also 3D Eagle Crotch Underwear, allowing you to bring justice and the American Way with you wherever you tread.
Wear it to work, to school, or to court… or (caution: true Americans only!) the only thing you wear to vote other than the Stars and Stripes, draped majestically across your shoulders.
Best of all, they’re only $3.95 a pair: as cheap as a drive-in movie theater burger, and guaranteed to contain more meat.
O.K. I’ll get my coat.